I procrastinated doing a portrait of my mom and her sister. Part of the problem was, I think it was beyond my ability at the point I was attempting it, and probably still is. When winter set in it was too cold to paint in the garage where my "studio" was set up. I had gotten a roll of Belgian linen and a bunch of new brushes and had every intention of continuing to paint that portrait, but I didn't. There were times I could have painted, but came home from work too tired to paint. I had hopes of completing that portrait before my mother passed away, but I didn't. We had her funeral this morning. Looking back, my first attempt was made more than 2 years ago. I should have had it done.

After the service I had spoke to my sister on the phone. She said she felt like she was always waiting. She has many projects and interests she would like to do. She is very creative and talented. Much more so than I am. One of the things she likes to do was quilt, which my mom was a master at. She was caring for a sick husband who eventually passed away. Then she got busy with the business they ran together after he passed, and she was waiting to sell it. She wanted to spend more time with my mom after she sold the business. She wanted to quilt with her and take her out to fabric shops and the like. Now she can't.

I guess the reason I'm writing this is, it's easy to get caught up in the minutia of day to day life. It's easy to think some things aren't as important as other things. It's easy to take for granted that things will not change, but they do. I regret not finishing that portrait as much as my sister regrets not spending more time with my mother instead of waiting.

Don't let the little things get in the way of what's really important. Tomorrow is promised to no one.
I did get to spend some quality time with her before she passed. Something I will always be grateful for. I just wish I had finished that painting for her.


  • Newb

    You have my sympathy for your loss.

    Please resolve to finish and dedicate the portrait to your Mother.
    Draw strength from the good memories that the painting will evoke.

  • Very sorry for your loss, if you can, finish the portrait, it will be a lasting tribute.
  • edited February 2014
    Thanks Denis and Ron. I have every intention of doing so. I have a Belgian linen canvas stretched, toned and triangular grid applied. It was going to be the first one off my first roll of Claussens. I want to do a still life first. Took this of a floral arrangement I brought home. I wanted the basket for future set ups. Had fun shifting the exposure from 0 to just below negative one, one increment at a time. roughly 1/4 stop. I like this one the best. It should keep me busy for a while.image
  • I'm so sorry newb. Time goes by too quickly. I think your flower arrangement will make a beautiful painting.
  • Thanks @Ronna. I haven't been here much. The past 2 months have been going to work and then to the hospital. Doesn't leave time for much. I hope to paint a whole lot more now.
  • Oh Yeah! Good luck, look forward to seeing your results. Are you going to include work stages in your posts? :)
  • edited February 2014
    I will take pictures along the way and probably post near the finish. I want to go for a painterly look. I have a very bad habit of drawing with the brush. I want to break out of that habit. It should be interesting. Every painting is a learning experience at my stage. No matter how bad they come out. I'm more concerned with hitting the right values.
  • newb...sorry for your loss. Don't look back any more with regret because even if you had finished the painting you would only beat yourself up about something else. I have spent a life of "if only" "should have done " . I have had so much death and illness in my family during the last five years. I am determined to try harder to do the things that make me feel better more often and not beat myself up as much. I think it is normal to feel that we did not do enough when we lose someone we love. Paint each brushstroke with love and remembering the good times with your Mother and you will feel much better about this. Best wishes Marie
  • newb your thread gave me a well needed boot up the you know what...I am loading photos onto disk to print so I can Paint *-:)
Sign In or Register to comment.